


Heart and Soul

by XchrisisX



Series: Baywatch [1]
Category: Baywatch (2017)
Genre: Aftercare, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Dom/sub, F/F, F/M, M/M, Past Abuse, Past Sexual Abuse, Praise Kink, Sex Toys, Subdrop
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-02
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2019-12-31 22:15:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18323027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XchrisisX/pseuds/XchrisisX
Summary: Matt is on suppressants and pretending he's a Dom. When the mission with Leeds is wrapped up and everything catches up to him, he realises he's going into a drop, and has run out of suppressants. He panics and tries to run.Mitch realises he might actually have a chance to get what he wants. He just needs Matt to realise that too.





	1. Chapter 1

Matt sat in the lifeguard tower, smiling prettily, as composed on the outside as he was trembling on the inside. He could feel the drop pressing into him, the occasional tremor in his body a dead giveaway for anyone who knew enough to look, and no one looked. Matt made sure no one ever looked. He worked so hard to get himself out of the foster care system and make something of himself, and the thing is, he couldn't have done it if people believed that he was a Sub. 

Matt clenched his right fist, the tightening across his knuckles serving as a grim reminder that he had done what is essentially social suicide for a Sub. He had hit a Dom. A really shitty Dom, but a Dom nonetheless. A sad smirk twisted his lips. No one wants a Sub that fights back. If it got out that he was a Sub and he had hit a Dom, he wouldn't even be able to get a professional Dom to play with him, let alone find one that actually cared. 

That's okay though, because he had worked damn hard to make sure that he passed for a Dom. He didn't even use professional Doms. He couldn't. There was too much of a risk that they would recognise him, and out him as a Sub. The thing is, he was finally fitting in. The people he worked with - Mitch, Summer, Steph, CJ and Ronnie? - they were good people. They didn’t expect anything from him except that he did his job, and that he did it well. They didn't go easy on him. They treated him like he was one of them, and he didn't want to lose that. 

They even treated Ronnie equally even though Ronnie wasn't a Dom. He was just a Beta. Matt knew better than to fool himself though. A Beta was still miles ahead of a Sub. He had that lesson beat in to him in his foster homes. All three of them. Even Ronnie would turn on him if he knew. He would trust his Baywatch family with his life, but he could never trust them with this Sub status. 

Matt was grateful he hadn’t seen any of them with their Subs. He didn't know how he would handle it if he saw them hurt someone else, someone who needed them. He definitely wouldn't have been able to handle it if he saw Mitch hurt his Sub. Never mind that the Sub was probably a good Sub and enjoyed it. He held Mitch on a pedestal at the back of his mind, he respected the older man. To have his fantasies of kneeling for him and being treated gently crushed would be heartbreaking. It was what got him through sometimes. 

He was okay though. He didn't need a Dom. He had tried that when he was younger. Hoped for affection and praise and all he got was pain and humiliation. Doms didn't care about their Subs. They only cared about themselves. Matt sighed, pushing that thought back. Logically, he knew he was projecting his issues. His last Dom had made that clear. Good Subs enjoyed being hurt and humiliated. Good Subs took what their Doms gave without complaint. He just wasn't a good sub. He wasn't meant for a Dom. He didn't need a Dom. He got by on his own. 

It was just a matter of making sure he took his suppressants to prevent him from dropping, and giving himself rewards and punishments to help him stay stable. His reward was cuddling a pillow with Mitch's shirt on it, breathing in his scent until he peacefully drifted off to sleep with thoughts of being called a good boy in Mitch's baritone in his mind. Punishment's depended on what he needed. He struggled in the beginning, unable to stop the punishment without someone there to forgive him, but he was better now. He set a time limit for his punishments, and he stuck by it, regardless of how he felt at the time. Self-discipline was his Dom now, and he got by. No one noticed if he pushed himself into utter exhaustion working out, completing reps until all he could feel was the burn in his muscles. No one noticed if he missed meals for a few days. 

Matt swallowed heavily, his gaze to the floor, secure in the knowledge that no one was paying attention to him here. His knees tremble with the need to sink to the floor and prostate himself for a punishment, but he fights it back, determined to wait this out until he either got an out of this little team celebration, or he was secure and alone. When he could figure out what his punishment was going to be and take his suppressants. 

"Matt? Are you okay?" A soft voice asked near his ear and Matt flinched before he could stop it. He forced a smile as he met Summer's worried eyes before his instincts screamed at him to drop eye contact. He scrubbed a hand over his face and faked a yawn. 

"Yeah." Matt replied softly, before gritting his teeth and pushing the word out with more force. To sound confident, like a Dom would. "Yeah. Of course." He pulled up a cocky smile, every line of his body forced to go from trembling to confident. He was good at this. Faking being a Dom. He could still feel the occasional shiver running through his body, and Matt clenched his jaw to stop his teeth from chattering. 

He needed to get out of here. He was so close to a drop it was ridiculous. The thing was though, he shouldn't be. He took a suppressant mere hours ago. He should only be feeling like this if he had missed a dose. His eyes flicked to the clock on the wall of the tower, giving it a cursory glance before his gaze snapped back in horror and he straightened abruptly. He missed a fucking dose in all the action. No wonder he was feeling so disgustingly Subby.

"Actually," Matt began through numb lips, wincing when it came out too loud and Mitch's head swung around, the intense weight of his gaze burning the side of his face and nearly making him drop to his knees right there. Matt locked his knees as he trailed off, knowing he was going to have to tread carefully to get out of this. 

"Actually?" Summer prompted, looking at him with soft eyes, and Matt was hit with a wave of shame so strong that his knees buckled and he immediately had to look at the floor. He had suspected that she knew, but she never treated him any differently. She never said anything though, so he just kept up cover. 

He was lying to her. To them all. To Mitch. He squeezed his eyes shut, his mind racing. Maybe he should just tell them. Maybe they'd keep him on the team. He scoffed internally. As if they wouldn't keep him. He was a bad sub. It wasn't like he and Mitch were going to run off into the sunset to live happily ever after. He's been in this situation before. He had trusted someone, and it bit him in the arse. He wouldn't do that again. He couldn’t. 

Matt heard movement in front of him and he opened his eyes, flinching back violently at the sight of Mitch stooped in front of him to look in his eyes, a look of concern on his face. He flinched again when Mitch gripped his chin, forcing Matt to look at him. Matt jerked back, slapping Mitches hand away from his face and ignoring the look of shock on his face and the small gasps from the other Dom's. 

"Don't touch me!" Matt snarled, before staring down at his hand in shock. He's done it again. Hit a Dom. Not just any Dom. Mitch. "Sorry S-" He cut himself off before he could let the sir leave his lips. "Sorry." He could feel the panic rising, choking him. "Sorry." He said again, wincing at how redundant it sounded, before sliding along the bench behind him towards the door, taking care not to brush against Mitch. "I-I-I'm not feeling well. Adrenaline must have worn off. Nearly drowned, y-know?" He forced the words out, trying to sound cocky and ignoring the slight stutter that had made its way to his voice. "I might just go to bed. S-sleep it off." 

"Do you need a lift home?" Mitch asked quietly. Home. Matt cringed at the word, one arm reaching up to rub at the ache in his chest. Not home anymore. Not after this. He needed to leave, before they put two and two together and figured out what he was. Being treated like shit from his Baywatch family would break him. 

"No!" Mitch said adamantly before wincing at how it came out. "No. I can get there fine." He said, trying to sound confident. He backed up to the door, and paused there, looking at each of them carefully to commit their features to memory. He pulled in a deep breath to steady himself before lifting his eyes to meet Mitch's concerned gaze, lips twitching up into a sad mockery of smirk. 

"I'll see you all tomorrow, yeah?" Matt said, before walking out of the door without waiting for a reply.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mitch realises that he needs to step up.

"That was weird." Steph broke the silence and Mitch turned to look at her, a frown etched into the handsome lines of his face. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say he was going into a drop." 

"What? Like a Dom drop?" Ronnie asked, confused and CJ smiled at him sweetly, brushing the hair back from his face. Mitch smiled at her, happy that she had finally got the guy she had been pining after for the last three years. 

"No." Mitch replied slowly. "Like a Sub drop." 

"That can't be though. He would have told us if he was a Sub." CJ said. "We would have changed the way that we handled him." Steph and Mitch looked at each other. 

"Exactly." Ronnie replied, frowning in thought.

"He's Matt Brody." Mitch said, his voice dropping an octave in mimicry. "He would want to prove himself."

"You're all idiots." Summer snapped, and everyone turned to stare at her. "Of course he wouldn't have told you. He respects you all. He likes that you don't treat him differently." 

"You knew." Mitch said, the words coming out strangely accusatory. Summer rolled her eyes.

"I suspected." She replied with a small shrug. "I thought he'd tell me when he was ready and trusted me." She turned to look across the beach. "I guess he doesn't trust me yet." 

"Well he seemed pretty adamant about leaving. He must have a Dom he's seeing that will help him with his drop." Ronnie said thoughtlessly and then flinched back as Mitch tensed. A small frown appeared on Summer's face.

"No. He's not seeing anyone. He has a crush-" Summer cut herself off before she could finish the sentence. Mitch stiffens, jealousy choking him for a brief moment before he could get it under control. 

"On you. We know." Mitch replied stiffly, rolling his eyes. 

"What? No!" Summer replied, aghast. "He's actually been helping me make my crush jealous." She mumbled, a blush starting to stain her cheeks.

"Well then. We know he doesn't have a Dom. Maybe he's seeing a professional?" Steph said, breezing over the awkwardness of the situation. Mitch shook his head. 

"He wouldn't. They'd recognise him and it would be all over the papers." Mitch said thoughtfully.

"Well that's settled then. Summer, you need to go after him and look after his drop." CJ said plainly. 

"What? I can't." Summer replied, shocked. Mitch scowled. 

"It's dangerous for Subs to drop by themselves, and very selfish of you to refuse based on liking someone else. Matt needs you right now." Mitch said, furious that she was refusing over such a petty reason. 

"No I mean, I really don't think I can. He doesn't trust me enough. He wouldn't feel safe with me like that and I don't think I could make him go down." Summer replied honestly. "I'm not strong enough for him. He'd push back and that would be worse."

"She's right Mitch." CJ said slowly. "We don't know how long it's been since someone has put him down. He could hurt someone who isn't as physically strong as him, especially if he's not going to take orders." Mitch sighed and scrubbed a hand down his face. Steph snorted and nudged him. 

"Don't even try to pretend that you're not going to enjoy looking after him. I've seen the way you look at him when he's not paying attention. If you play your cards right, he might even keep you." Steph said with a smirk and Mitch scowled in response, trying to hide the fact that his heart leapt at the thought. 

"Don't hurt him Mitch." Summer said, voice small. 

"Oh please. Mitch couldn't hurt a sub if he tried. He's an absolute marshmallow." Steph cut in, before striding forward to take Summers arm and walk her to the door. "We're all going to split Mitch, and make ourselves scarce. I'll make sure both yours and Matts shifts are covered for the next few days. Bring him back to us as conceited as ever, yeah?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt jumps to conclusions.

As soon as Matt was safe in his room at Mitch's house, his knees buckled and was forced to stop and lean against the wall. He couldn't stay here. He needed to leave. He stayed in that position for a few long moments while he caught his breath before forcing himself to walk to his duffel bag. He began stuffing everything within reach into the bag before giving it a hasty shake and zipping it up. Pausing he opened the cupboard beside his makeshift bed and pulled out the pillow he had hidden there. It was a pillow he had snuck from Mitch's room, covered it in one of Mitch's clean shirts that seemed to have his scent embedded in it. He was going to need it for this drop. 

Swinging the strap over his shoulder, he swung around and froze at the sight of Mitch blocking the doorway. Mitch's eyes trailed from his face, to the full duffel bag and the pillow he clutched to his chest before his eyes met Matt's, a grim expression on his face. 

"Where are you going Bieber?" Mitch asked, his tone bland, and Matt flinched back before he realised who he was supposed to be. A Dom. 

"Out, and don't call me Bieber." Matt snapped back at him and then cringed before he could stop it, shame and self-hate swirling in his stomach. He shouldn't be talking to a Dom like that. He definitely shouldn't be talking to Mitch like that. Mitch stepped forward and Matt flinched back violently, nearly falling on the bed, expecting to be hit. Mitch froze before taking a slow step back to his original position.

"I don't think you're in the right headspace to be going out there right now." Mitch replied carefully. Matt shot him a disgusted sneer. 

"How typical of you knot heads. Making decisions for everyone else." Matt snarled before freezing, paling a little.

"You knot heads?" Mitch questioned, an eyebrow raised.

"Us knot heads I mean. Boy, do we like making decisions." Matt forced a laugh, desperately trying to backtrack. 

"Right," Mitch replied slowly, seemingly debating with himself before coming to a decision and straightening up. "This is getting us nowhere. I know you're a Sub Brody. I'm here to look after you during your drop." He said the words bluntly, not even trying to sugar coat it anymore. 

"I'm not a Sub." Matt snapped in response, feeling the panic rise again as he desperately searched for a way out that didn't involve trying to get past the hulking figure in the doorway. Too bad this room didn't have a window, because he would throw himself out of it right now if the option was available. 

"Really now?" Mitch drawled, and Matt felt the rest of the colour in his face drain away. 

"Mitch, please don't-" Matt mumbled through numb lips.

"Kneel." Mitch's voice dropped an octave and the word seems to roll out of his mouth in a smooth glide, the authority in his voice hitting Matt like a kick to the chest. Before he has a chance to process the command, Matt hits the ground so fast he thinks there's a very real possibility that he's fractured his kneecaps. His instincts push him down further and he prostrates himself in front of Mitch, his forehead resting on the ground and his arms out straight, palms up. Ready for punishment. Ready for whatever his Dom will give him. 

He hears Mitch suck in a breath and he cringes, his mind racing as he imagines what he looks like, presenting himself like this. His eyes water and he squeezes them shut, determined not to show how terrified he was. A hand rests on his shoulder and Matt jumps wildly, not expecting the touch. He scoffs angrily at himself. Of course there was going to be touch. He was a Sub. That's what happens. 

"Good boy." Mitch breathes out and Matt melts a little before he can prevent it, his body slumping further onto the floor, but almost immediately he forces himself to stiffen and go back to the rigid posture he had before. "Now that we have that cleared up, I want you to stand up and follow me." Matt's body unfolds itself and he petulantly follows Mitch, unable to find the willpower to disobey a direct order so close to a drop. 

Mitch waits for him at the doorway to another room, and gives him a small pleased smile when Matt slowly trudges up to him. A hand reaches out and grips the back of his neck strongly, and Matt goes week in the knees, his eyelids fluttering shut at the dominant gesture and heat pooling low in his belly. After a few seconds of basking in the calm the gesture created, Matt jerks back out of Mitch's grip, glaring at the ground. 

"Don't touch me." Matt snarls as he backs away. He whips around in fright as something hard and unforgiving touches his elbow, before forcing himself to relax again as he realises that it was just the wall in the hall way. 

"I should have known that you weren't going to make this easy for us." Mitch sighed, before gesturing into the room. Matt blanched as he glanced in, taking in a large room with a large bed in the centre. 

"Easy for you, you mean." Matt spits, the rush of disappointment and betrayal hitting him in the stomach so hard that he practically curls around it, his shoulders hunched as he wraps his arms around himself.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mitch begins to provide some comfort.

Mitch crosses his arms across his chest, keeping his hands to himself and being careful not to make any sudden movements, as Matt slowly inches past him into the bedroom. He gives Matt a cursory glance over, wincing in sympathy as he takes in the subtle, full-body tremble that was happening in front of him. He knew from previous experience that Subs needed to be warm, and praised, and receive skin contact during a drop. They could last from a few minutes to a few days, depending on the Sub. Everyone was different. The issue here was getting Matt to allow him close enough to be able to provide the care he needed. 

"Easy for us Matt. Look at me." Mitch says, enunciating clearly and allowing a bit of authority to enter his tone, and then stays silent, waiting patiently while Matt struggles to lift his head and make eye contact. His pupils are blown wide, gaze unfocussed when he finally meets Mitch's gaze, and his constant tremble turns into a full-body shudder as Mitch murmurs another 'Good boy'. 

"I want you to strip and climb into the bed." Mitch says, and watches as the small pulse point at Matt's neck quickens, indicating his hammering heart. 

"Why are you doing this?" Matt chokes out as he moves further into the middle of the room, and Mitch sighs, closing the door and flicking the lock shut, 

"You need to be treated the way you deserve, and you need to be taken care of because apparently you won't do it yourself." Mitch replies and Matt swings around, temper flaring even as his fingers began unbuttoning the buttons on his trousers. His gaze meets Mitch's, and there's anger there, but also fear and hurt and a vulnerability that makes Mitch's chest ache. 

"I can take care of myself! I'm -" 

"Matt Brody. I know." Mitch cuts in. "And there's the cocky little shit we all know and love." Mitch tries to tease as normal, but it falls flat as Matt stiffens and drops his eyes, his knees buckling and dropping him to the floor again and he prostrates himself. 

"Sorry. I-sorry. I didn't mean to argue. I won't do it again." Matt mumbled into the floor, and Mitch curses himself mentally for his stupidity. Matt is way too close to the drop for teasing. Anything he says right now has the potential to be interpreted as aggressive. Mitch crouches down beside Matt, placing a gentle hand on his upper arm and pulling him back to his feet. 

Maybe giving Matt back a little bit of control, a little bit of choice, would help.

"You're forgiven." Mitch soothes, rubbing his hand in small circles over Matt's bicep. "Do you want to undress yourself, or would you like me to do it for you?" Matt tenses again, his eyes squeezing closed, but doesn't pull away. 

"I'll do it." Matt whispers and Mitch makes a quiet noise of agreement before letting go of Matt's arm and backing away again. Mitch turns around, trying to block out the sound of Matt undressing as he slowly began to remove his own clothes. He opens his cupboard and removes a clean set of boxers before dropping his pants and pulling them on. Normally, he sleeps naked, but he doesn't think Matt would appreciate that now, or in the morning when he wakes up hopefully out of his drop and more like himself. 

He keeps his back turned, hovering at his desk and pretending to be busy until the creaking on the bed stops and he's confident Matt is under the covers. Seeing Mitch with a boner is not going to calm Matt down right now, and seeing Matt naked is guaranteed to make him hard. Mitch has always been interested, Matt has just never given any indication that he returned those feelings. This might be his only chance to make Matt see Mitch as a Dom. Matt's dom, specifically. He can't fuck this up. 

Mitch takes a deep breath, before turning around and looking at the bed, thinking about his next move. Instantly, he feels as though the air has been punched out of his lungs, and he hardens so fast he feels a little woozy. 

Matt is on his knees, his legs spread wide for balance in a way that lifts his arse into the air, his chest lowered down onto the mattress, and his hands reaching back to spread his cheeks apart, baring his hole. His face is turned to the side, and he has his eyes squeezed shut. The silence in the room is deafening, and Matt shifts nervously, his eyes cracking open to glance back, and Mitch shakes his head, willing his brain to work again. Matt gaze drops to his crotch, before flushing and squeezing his eyes shut again.

"Fuck." Mitch says, his voice coming out hoarsely, and he drops his hand to squeeze at his cock. "As beautiful as that view is baby, I want you on your back for now, and under the covers." Humiliation courses through Matt, making tears prick at his eyes. Feeling a stupid mix of relief and disappointment, he scrambles under the covers, sinking low into the bed and hiding his face under one of the pillows. Hidden from view, he rubs his knuckles against his eyes, furious with himself and confused. He's Matt Brody. He doesn't fucking cry. 

The sound of the TV turning on makes Matt cautiously lift up a small bit of the blanket to peer out, and he flushes at the sound of Mitch's amused chuckle, ducking back under the covers. The bed dips beside him and he's forced to roll onto his stomach and grip the edge of the bed to stop himself from rolling into Mitch's body. A heavy arm wraps around his waist and he's pulled towards a rock solid body as though he weighs nothing, and he goes rigid at the feeling of something hard poking him in the hip.

A heavy hand lands on the back of his neck and Matt tenses, expecting pain, but Mitch only begins a gentle massage directly under his hairline. The hand threads through his hair, scratching gently at his scalp before stroking firmly down his spine to his lower back and then lifting back to his neck and beginning the massage again. Matt lay there for a few moments, confused before shaking his head and ripping himself out of Mitch's grip. Mitch looked back at him calmly, his head propped on one hand and his over hand hovering over the space Matt's head had occupied. 

"What are you doing?" Matt snapped, confused. "Aren't you going to punish me? Stop messing with me and just do it!" Mitch just looked back at him levelly. 

"Do you think you need to be punished? Mitch asked, frowning. Matt stared at him helplessly for a few moments before shrugging and looking away. 

"Isn't that what this is about? You're here to punish me?" Matt asked, voice small. 

"I'm here to help you through your drop." Mitch replied quietly. "Once this is over, if you still believe you need a punishment, we can talk about it then. Lay back down." Matt cringed at the order and lowered himself back into the bed.

"Good boy." Mitch whispered and Matt flushed at the praise, feeling stupidly proud of doing something so easy.


End file.
